By and copyright of Owen Quinn author of the Time Warriors and Zombie Blues
Cover by Conaire McMullan
The zombie rollercoaster continues as the undead continue to give us their view of being a rotting corpse under the control of Mother Nature.
This time round we meet Comic Book zombie and the zombie who thinks the ending of Toy Story 3 is sacrilege. What happens when a zombie’s faith in God is rocked to its very foundation and why is the spirit of Elvis Presley still going strong in the vast
roaming herds?
A zombie tells why the covid pandemic was much preferable to being undead and why having a club foot makes you feel normal as a zombie. Plus more zombie characters than you can shake a stick at.
Available on Amazon now!
World Through a Window Zombie
I knew all about the midlife crisis that men go through no matter how much they deny it.
Unlike the female menopause which according to my cow of a former wife allows a woman to get away with stabbing her husband in the middle of the night just for snoring too loudly, the male version seems to strike at any age. In fact it has different impacts on different men. I’ve known men get struck down with it at thirty and suddenly they are married to the thorn girlfriend they were about to dump. It isn’t long before a divorce comes through as if the veil drops and they suddenly see in the cold light of day the mistake they made while in the throes of the crisis.
For me it was a sudden smack in the face as I fretted over all the things I haven’t done which totally eclipsed everything that I had done in life. A near death experience didn’t help at all but it lasted for a little over a week. Other men buy new cars; cheat with a younger woman or man or go under the knife to pull that sagging skin back, all in an effort to keep their youth. Maybe it’s some sort of inbuilt thing in our genetics but whatever it is it gets us all at some point.
So here I am at fifty two years of age in relatively good health, survivor of the midlife crisis. I would like to think I still have a lot of years ahead of me. I’m married with two teenage kids and in a job I enjoy with a house that seems to be in a constant cloud of redecoration.
Most of my friends are scattered around the country due to jobs etc so I don’t have any of them close at hand for a drink or any type of social life. Social media is our way of keeping in touch unless we arrange a meet up or there’s a convention or show of some sort on. My wife recently graduated from university and is in a new career which seems to take up most of her time and the kids live in their rooms ironically with their friends’ network also over social media. They will be going to further education in a heartbeat leaving their old folks behind until of course their coppers run dry. With a bit more free time, I indulged in some of my old hobbies which due to time and finances had fallen to the wayside a bit.
I recently dug out my old collection of Star Wars figures and vehicles from when I was a kid and began filling in the missing gaps. Jesus I remember when these figures only cost me ninety nine pence now some of these buggers are charging a fortune for them. Hindsight’s a truly wonderful thing so thankfully it was only a matter of replacing the missing figures and ships occasionally picking up a little extra that caught my fancy. At my age I have a disposable income which we never had when me and the wife got together and were putting our home together. It was years of red bill city and debt collectors from Provident. Nothing we did seemed to put us above water and with two young kids it was hard. I think that was part of the reason the missus went back to school at her age so we wouldn’t fall back into that plus it was to satisfy her own needs to do something worthwhile that she could be proud of. I don’t have anything to really complain about and yet…
I can’t believe I am saying this. I don’t know why.
At fifty two, I have never felt so lonely in all my life.
It began when the Covid restrictions were imposed and the whole country went into lockdown. Life changed for all of us as pubs, gyms, barbers, comic shops were all shut down to prevent the spread of the disease. Even clothes shops were shut as not considered essential. Yet the supermarkets were still allowed to sell their clothes ranges. With so many people browsing through so many garments, surely there was a source of contamination right there no matter how many blue rolls and hand and trolley sanitiser they provided at the front doors. Social distancing and bubbles quickly became common place with threats of fines and police raids for anyone breaching the law or holding house parties. Those vulnerable people including me due to asthma were restricted by government shielding. This meant that we could not leave the house bar medical reasons or a walk for exercise reasons. Millions were trapped in their own homes as the dark cloud of the virus turned the whole world into something we had never imagined. We could not see our families and social media became a lifeline for all of us. The old and the infirm were trapped in their homes unable to see grandchildren or loved ones which were often the highlight of their days. I remember one girl telling me she couldn’t see her grandmother for the entire three months but when shielding was eased the first place she went to was her grandmother’s house to check on her. Well granny had put on her coat, grabbed her handbag and was out before anyone knew where she was. Talk about a hare out of a greyhound trap. There was nothing wrong with her hips that day.
The Time Warriors and Beyond 