By and copyright of Owen Quinn author of the Time Warriors and Zombie Blues
Cover by Conaire McMullan
The zombie rollercoaster continues as the undead continue to give us their view of being a rotting corpse under the control of Mother Nature.
This time round we meet Comic Book zombie and the zombie who thinks the ending of Toy Story 3 is sacrilege. What happens when a zombie’s faith in God is rocked to its very foundation and why is the spirit of Elvis Presley still going strong in the vast
roaming herds?
A zombie tells why the covid pandemic was much preferable to being undead and why having a club foot makes you feel normal as a zombie. Plus more zombie characters than you can shake a stick at.
Available on Amazon now!
Don’t Call Me Andy Zombie
But this isn’t a story about best friends or the very real importance of friendships as you get older. You should already know that folks, especially in this hellish world. Zombies are spreading across the surface of this planet like mould on cheese. I can only hope you guys are learning just how important friendships are now more than ever and being open to telling others that.
No, this is a story about the differences between two people. It’s about learning to really accept someone else’s differing opinion and respecting it. If it opens your eyes to a new way of thinking then that has to be healthy and make a better world for everyone.
Yeah, anyone that knows me will laugh out loud at that. As a human I took the nick when someone had a different opinion about sci fi or movie than me. I did it mostly to wind them up but part of me was feeling sorry for those who couldn’t see I was right; which was all the time of course….
At this stage of the game folks, you hopefully have learned to see us shuffling moaning zombies in a totally different night.
As I walk this shivering land seeking out scavenger humans to feed on, I relive my life in my head thinking of those happy times in work and home. Anyone with a best buddy will know you end up talking to them more than your wife at times because you go through things together totally outside the husband and wife stuff.
They’re the ones who take the hump because you didn’t tell them you were in hospital or going though something yet they do the same. You’d drop everything for them yet don’t want to bring your woes to their lives either. Your buddy is the one you talk shit with and find it the most hilarious thing on the planet. Hence the point of this story; how two laughing argumentative mates similar yet different, saw the ending of the classic movie, Toy Story 3, with completely opposite eyes.
War, most certainly had been declared Mervin!
Both of us love Star Wars, for me it kept the bullies out of my head as a kid. I escaped to the galaxy far, far away through my toys. I still remember the first time I heard of Star Wars on the news and when I bought my first two action figures, Luke Skywalker and the Death Squad Commander for the princely sum of ninety nine pence. Little did I know the path that would send me on for the rest of my life. I still had a lot of Star Wars vintage toys from growing up but when Mervin took the notion to start collecting them from scratch, it spurred me on to fill in my missing blanks. War had suddenly become the search to find our childhoods again. To be honest I never lost mine. I might have the forty something body of a stud with medallion hairy chest and come to bed eyes…fine, can’t you let a man have a little hope when his body has decided to go south? We both took the notion to fill in those missing blanks and complete our Star Wars universe action figure and vehicle collections. Those bonds for both of us had been strong all our lives but adult stuff got in the way. The many figures and ships we amassed over the years were in boxes and plastic tubs and to be fair neglected for years. Knowing they were there was enough.
But that kick-started a new buddy quest to look at what we had and finally finish it. It is a side effect of being mid forties because you have a disposable income to a degree and you want to complete things you never got round to. EBay became our second home and in one of those couldn’t be bothered days in work, our conversation turned to Toy Story 3.
Now as you know at the end of that movie Andy gives away Woody, Buzz and all the others to a little girl because he is going off to college life. He is hoping the toys will bring as much happiness to her that they did with him. Then he drives off into his new adult life. Now, the world thought this was a perfect ending and cried including my buddy.
My face fell like someone had just thrown a turd cross the room and it had landed in the luscious flowing chocolate fountain.
The ending of Toy Story 3 was a horror story. It was as shocking as Ripley falling to her death with the alien popping out of her chest. It was like Brad finding his wife’s head in the case at the climax of Seven. I didn’t cry along at all with the dewy eyed masses enraptured with Woody and the others.
Stuck in the cinema, I stared open mouthed but inwardly was screaming at the screen, ‘NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!’
The Time Warriors and Beyond 